Ding! Lightbulb Moment!

Ever feel silly when the thing that you just realized has been the thing that you have always known? When that happens, you cannot understand why you never saw it before.

That is me now. In conversation with a friend earlier, I was complaining about how I am just not as committed in my Godly walk knowing that I need to be. I shared with her my feelings why. Adding, I know that this is an excuse it shouldn't matter but I just can't get over being bitter about the circumstances that I feel God should have removed from me by now.

Her response to me was remember Paul? He was a powerful agent of God (paraphrased) but he had a thorn in his side. It never left him but he didn't let it stop him (also paraphrased). Realizing that was true, I set out to find that scripture. It is 2 Corinthians 12:1-10.

I read the scripture and Ding! Lightbulb Moment. I have read this passage several times before but I never understood what I understood this time. The Words were the same, yet I was reading with a different need. I read, read, and reread the scripture. Every line in it from 1-10 made sense to me. I could relate to it.

The Ah Ha! I took from this passage was an understanding that I never possessed. Mainly because I have never been at this point in my life. Having grown passed old woes, I am dealing with new experiences that are explained here. I have reached the point in my story where this Word moves me through the stumbling block I've been dealing with the past few years. Now I can get on the other side and see what experiences lie in wait.

The irony (which is what prompted me to write about this) is that I was excusing away why I don't study the Bible. I accept that I don't feel pulled to because I felt a lack of Faith in how the Word benefits me. Can you believe that! Nikita 0 God 1 kagazillion, trillon, billion, etc.

If I did study the Bible, I would have been reminded of this scripture a long time ago (remember I did say years of dealing with my stumbling block). God's grace and mercy allowed her to say the thing that I needed to hear to make the move that I should be doing anyway. Then, icing on the cake, I find the answer I've been asking Him to give me.

So what's my point? You know that I write this blog to share the lessons that I learn from God and to demonstrate real life application. My point is this, I have prolonged my suffering by being disobedient to the Word of God. Study to show thyself approved (2 Timothy 2:15). Well I didn't, so I wasn't. When I did, then I was. Just like that...no waiting. Imagine that?

I need to study. I will study going forward. I've just got too much life to live to stay stuck in one rotation too long. God has plans and I surely have slowed them up. Jesus, my Savior died for my sins. The least I can do now is to try to keep moving toward the goal He had for me...reunification with the Father.

Jesus loves me, this I know for the Bible tells me so.